The month of January has absolutely been an emotional roller coaster, and for someone that’s generally bad with expressing emotions dealing with them has been interesting to say the least. My complete joy, overflowing love for my girls and this country, awe, and pure excitements are often juxtaposed by extreme loneliness, doubt, frustration, and sadness. Those moments, the bad ones, those are the moments when I begin to shift my focus to myself and what my selfish, sinful nature wants and what I’m missing in Texas. When my eyes are focused on my Savior that is when He reminds me that I am right in the middle of His will. That is when I am joyful and humbled to be here. It is at these moments when I am most satisfied in Him and as John Piper always says He is most glorified in me. And that is where I want more than anything, for God to be glorified by my life regardless of country I live in. Right now, this is where I belong and that brings God glory. Amen.
I am constantly humbled by the very fact that God has given me the opportunity to be here and that He chooses to use me. I want Him to use me of course, but the fact that he brought me here, to so many new beautiful people never ceases to amaze me. Often times I feel as if I’m learning more from the girls I am with on a daily basis than they are learning from me. That sounds cliché I know, everyone says it, but its so true!
Earlier last week while sitting on a bench at Casitas during their morning Bible study one of my girls came over and sat with me. She could see that I was visibly sad, nothing was wrong that I can remember, probably just missing my family more than usual that day. She put her arm around me and took my Bible. I was reading in Matthew while I listened to my girls sing beautiful songs to God in Spanish and she began flipping through it. When she found what she was looking for she handed my Bible back to me, pointed to Joshua 1:9 and instructed me to read it, hugged me again and went back to her seat. “Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” What a beautiful reminder, my God is with me! I love that God used her to remind me of His presence! Instead of being discouraged I should be encouraged because my God is with me. It doesn’t matter that I live far away from my family and best friends. I am supposed to live my life courageously and confidently because my God is with me and He is for me!
Pray for us! Pray that God would use this time here and that God would equip me and give me the opportunities to teach my girls, pour into my girls, and more importantly show them His love.
Also, I apologize once again for the lack of blogging. Writing in my journal is one thing but posting a blog for everyone to read, clearly not my thing. However, my new goal is to blog EVERY WEEKEND (get excited)! So be expecting another blog post in a few days.
Aaaaaaand, I found out in an email last night that the money I needed to raise for my last few months here has been raised! How awesome is that?! God is awesome and faithful to provide and it has been incredible to see Him do that! So, praise Him for providing for me financially! Thank you also to all of you that have been supporting me financially and for allowing God to use you and for partnering with me while I am here!
Thanks and gig ‘em.
Peace, love, and pursue Jesus.